it's official. ive came to that point in my life where i just want everything to fix its self up. i'm fed up trying to please other people and im fed up with the way my life is. my mum wants me to be skinnier, smarter and she wants me to get a job. i'm destined to be fat for the rest of my life. i know i am. i'm going to fail my As exams and i know for a fact i'll never be able to get a job! I have so much pressure on me to do well in life. to be this thing i'm not. but it's the thing i want to be.
i wish i had control over everything, all these thoughts that are going on in my head. the way i look. how smart i am. well i've decided. i can try. no more being the fat, average friend. tomorrow, the new me is going to shine through. i'm going to fast. for one week. then the abc diet. one hour in the morning on my excercise bike and half an hour before bed. i'm going to do four hours of studying at night time. i just need help with a study plan. ughh.. :(
-xe♥
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